Okay. I know everyone’s excited in this chapter. This is the chapter where I am going to talk about my diet. MY BAD DIET. Excited still? I hope so. Okay, Let’s do it!
3 years ago I wasn’t that fat (see above picture) Not that bad right? I just had a belly that I can never get rid off! They even told me that it will be there forever. Forever is real? I don’t think so.
When I was in college I had the opportunity to travel abroad for 4 months. I gained all the weight on Earth for 4 months. I repeat 4months. When I left the Philippines I was 55kgs and when I came back I almost weight 70kgs. Wait, how did I gained such weight? I cry. I was so overwhelmed with the foods. Name it, cakes, chocolates, ice cream, noodles, soda, buffet, coffee, french fries, burgers, hotdogs, chips, concentrated juice, canned goods, burritos, pizza and etc. Blame it to the food that taste SO GOOOOOOD. They are the reason why I feel unhealthy and saggy. Can I really blame the food? or the seller? maybe the manufacturer? No. blame it on me.
All the unhealthy stuff I ate, take note I ATE, I CHOSE, I PICKED and LOVED! The food that I put in my mouth were my decisions. I repeat MY DECISIONS. My decisions were bad. Can you really blame me? I grew up eating rice, with fried foods, dish with high content of sodium. No one ever told me that 1 cup of rice has 206 calories and no one told me in order not to get fat I have to lower my calorie intake from millions to less than 1000 calories per day. You were born lucky if your mom trained you like that. By the way, enough with the calories topic. Can they make desserts in vegan way and still taste like dessert even putting vegetables? I think that’s possible. Oh my gosh! Well, that too impossible though.
I still didn’t care. I didn’t care at all. I was happy that I can eat all the foods I want. I mean who doesn’t love foods right? I think we all do and we all wish that we can eat all the unhealthy foods the healthy way. I cry again.
Oops! Here I am with a monster bowl of ice cream..
Please don’t judge! Just a girl who loves to eat and just a girl who loves food! Please don’t pay attention to my belly, I know! I said I know and I’m not pregnant if that’s what you’re thinking. What the heck I said don’t pay attention to it! Oh my gosh! Okay Whatever!
When I graduated college I was heavy, pretty heavy! Oh yea, with big thighs, broad shoulders, huge calves and chubby cheeks. I didn’t even care how I will look in our graduation pictorial. All I care was I have to passed all my subjects, get my diploma, passed my thesis, graduate, travel the world, chase my dreams, be independent and chance to know myself better. Which I did, I got my diploma, chased my dreams, came back in United States, work hard and I know myself better. I am still in working hard stage, building career, house, business and keeping up good relationships with few people.
When I came back here last October 2014 I was 65kgs I would think so. I think I lose 5kgs considering I’m a graduating student, all the stress and pressure! Moving on, l love to eat. I was even more ecstatic since I can eat everything I want with my own money. Are you kidding me? Food is life, without food we all die not to mention I don’t want to die. Are you? Not me! I want to live, eat, pray, love, travel, help, and eat again.
Who wants to die just to get sexy? Not me, hell no! I am who I am. I eat what I eat. Are you the one who buys my food? No right? So shut up! Don’t tell me what to do. I can manage my own life. I don’t need to check calories. Besides I’m not that fat. Exercise is not in my vocabulary. Diet is not in my dictionary. Who needs to have a sexy body when I am always full? When I have friends and a boyfriend? Those were my good excuses before and it worked! It worked in a way I won’t feel guilty that I am fat.
MY DAILY MEALS BEFORE
What makes my diet bad? What was my food menu before? What was my daily activities too? Okay let’s break it down. Are you ready? I’m not. Just kidding! Okay.. let’s start.
Every morning I wake up late around like 9am, sometimes at 6:30 since I’m a morning person. I hate waking up late. My morning breakfast is like this,
1cup of rice + egg + hotdog + dried fish + vinegar + instant coffee + another rice
Are you guilty? I know right! Typically during the weekends after having breakfast I lay down and watch TV. That’s very usual to me. While watching the clock ticking waiting for lunch I always have my favorite Taho, chips, kakanin with matching soda as my morning snacks. An hour later lunch is ready.
3cups of rice + adobo + afritada + pansit + soda
Then lay down again and watch TV. When I look at the clock and realized dinner will be served 5 hours later. I get bored. I have to do something, exercise maybe? Nope. I wish. So here I am texting my friends to stroll with me in the mall maybe watch movie with them. That’s sounds like a plan and fun. Hey friend, wanna hang out with me today? Maybe have some coffee or watch movie? Yea. See you in 30minutes.
2 hours later finally we see each other. Hey where are you? Oh that’s a nice outfit! What’s the plan? I don’t know, maybe let’s eat first I’m hungry you showed up late. Okay, where to eat? McDonalds? Jollibee? KFC? Let’s do McDonalds, the WI-FI’s better. Can I oder,
Chicken Filet + rice + soda + sundae with chocolate hot fudge + Extra large fries + Apple pie
Please, thank you! Stayed almost 2 hours in McDonalds just to make sure everything I ordered is in my belly. Finally I invited my friend to stand up and stroll again. I think that’s the only cardio I do, walking inside the mall. Hey! Its still cardio you know, walking means exercise. Alright! Rock n Roll! After spending 2 hours chatting, laughing, doing crazy things here we are!! Hungry again. Oh wait look, is that siomai? Wait is that pizza? Can I have two orders of siomai and three slices of pizza please? Thank you! Oh my gosh! that was so good! That pizza was the bomb! I love beef siomai it’s so freaking delicious!
Finally decided it’s time to go home. Bye friend, see you in school, do we have home works? Never mind I’ll be early in school tomorrow. Bye! While waiting for a ride outside the mall, wait do I still have coins? Pulled out 50 pesos. Sir, 3 piece of kwek-kwek, 1 tokwa, 2 intestines, fish flat, one tempura please. Thank you! Oh my gosh I just can’t resist street foods they’re awesome!
Finally went home and as expected the traditional “pasalubong” is with me. I usually take home my favorite fruit Durian and sometimes a dozen of donuts for my daughter and sisters. What’s the meal tonight mom? The first question I asked when I get home. Fried fish with shrimp paste there’s cake in the fridge as well our neighbor give it to us earlier. Can you separate my part? I’m not really hungry but I’ll eat later. It’s 11:59 and I’m freaking hungry again. Slowly open the fridge and boom! Heart heart with my tongue out. DONUT!! CAKE!! PLUS MY DINNER!! Oh hold on, I hear something… Oh my gosh you shouted at the right time Sir! Can I have 4 “Balut” please since this is my favorite midnight snacks. Afterwards, it’s bed time and since I just ate I can’t sleep. I’m contemplating on how to lose weight, looking and liking all these body goals, summer goals on Facebook. Still won’t change the fact that I don’t know what is wrong with me and why all these girls can do it.
My day ends and I am fortunate. I enjoyed everything from the moment I wake up to the moment I sleep. Food I ate and the moments I shared with my friends. Yet why I still have 2am thoughts? Thoughts that still haunts me. Thoughts that makes me feel unwanted and I’m still not happy. I feel like I just survived the day I didn’t really live my life the way I wanted to be! I feel like everything is temporary and everything is so grandiose. In other words, everything had happened was just a dummy.
Is it actually a healthy lifestyle? When was the last time you count your calories intake? When was the last time you checked the label and the nutrition facts of the food you eat? When was the last time you sleep like a baby for 8 hours? What was your last meal?
My previous lifestyle was absolutely unhealthy. Let’s count the calories I take the whole day. Hold on I forgot that I can’t do math. Can you do it for me? Never mind. I mean it’s pretty obvious that I eat looooooooooot of calories per day. I cry.
Is that how you want to live your life? Is that how you live your life at the moment? Are you worried you’re heavy? Do you want to change? Can you do it? Do you have what it takes to change yourself? I know how you feel, I’ve been there. And Yes! I survived. Thank God I survived. All Glory and Praises belongs to Him. I am here, we can do this together, hang tight with me. You are reading this because you want to change. You shared, liked , asked and even sent me extended messages because you are crying hard in the middle of the night. I am here for you and I will leave you with this quote before I’ll start the next chapter,
“The worst thing you could do is give up only a few days into implementing your change”
How to Fixed Your Mindset Towards a Healthier Lifestyle
(To be continued)